We Are the Aggregate of Our Life Experiences

Whatever that saying is I do believe its true. I believe that we are a sum of our experiences in life. Mom told me of a man she dated back in the day. Had she married him and raised her family would we be who we are now? I would not have been raised on a farm in the country but would have been a city girl like my mom was/is. Mom tried hard to make me a girlie girl but the farm roots were too deep. I have had a variety of jobs and experiences in my 48 1/2 years. I've done manufacturing, sales, retail, blue collar, white collar, and no collar. Each of these jobs helped lead me to where I am today though I'm not sure what part the ladies lingerie has in my current life but maybe that is for a future endeavor! I've been laid off and I've been fired from jobs. Each time I have been lucky to find bigger and better opportunities around the corner. I don't always see the situation as a clear cut good thing at the time but hind sight is 20/20. As I go through this mate finding ritual called dating, I'm finding that there are some opportunities for improvement on selection as well as adjusting my own behavior. Because if you know me at all you know that I need work! So keep your heads high, if today doesn't work out as planned you can chalk it up as experience and use it in your résumé for tomorrow.

It's The Little Things

Little things are what make this crazy world bearable.  I try to do little things for those I care about.  Holding the door open for someone or picking up something they dropped? Someone I have been talking with once asked me what makes me smile on the inside.  It made me think about what does make me smile… here is my list.

• The sounds of my mom’s voice
• Being greeted at the door after work by all three furkids
• The smell of puppy breath
• The sound of the first leaves of spring rustling in a breeze
• Kisses and Poodle Hugs from Buffy
• Getting a text or email from someone special first thing in the morning and last thing at night
• The smell of dirt and freshly mowed grass in spring
• Riding a long and windy country road and smelling the smells of the country
• Sitting in my backyard watching the day sky turn into evening sky.
• Riding all the way to work and not hitting one red light




What are the little things in life that make you smile?



Harley






Lucy






Long and winding road



relaxing in the backyard



Evening sky from my yard



Commuting 



Me & Mom

• 

  2 of the 3 furkids

  

  Puppy Love!

Powerless? Never!

How do you define power?  Well the OxfordDictionary says 1. the ability or capacity to dosomething or act in a particular way, 2. the capacity or ability to direct or influencethe behavior of others or the course of events,  3. physical strength and force exerted by something or someone,  4. energy that is produced by mechanical, electrical, or othermeans and used to operate a device etc.  This week we saw several powersin action.  We saw the power of a drop of water when combined with manyothers can cripple one of the largest cities in the world.  We saw agentle breeze turn into a hurricane so large that it covered 2/3 of our greatcountry.  We saw the power go out when these forces took down power grids,power stations, power lines and power poles.  As my power went out lastnight I knew it would be a while before it came back on.  The force of thewind was so strong that it made the rain drops sound like rocks being thrownagainst my windows and siding.  I settled into my recliner, covered myselfin a quilt, and surrounded myself with my furkids.  I read on my KindleFire until the batter power was exhausted then moved on up to bed.  Residingin the city, we have the luxury of being able to use water.  Having grownup on a farm I remembered we needed to bring a bucket of water in to flush. On the city water system we use the power of gravity to do the work.  Some of my friends and neighbors may still bepowerless but candle power and battery power are available.   

We have also been witness tothe power of community.  There is powerin numbers but we are more than just numbers. Neighbors helping neighbors, checking in to make sure we are all ok. Wesaw the power of social network communities where our friends a thousand milesaway prayed to the powers above for our safety and well being.  So whether you have power or not, know thatthere is power everywhere.  If you loseone form, reach into the darkness and you will find another power. 

Two Steps Forward and One Step Back

The title says it all today.  As I thought I had met someone who "got" me and made a connection it appeared to be wishful thinking on my part.  I let me guard down for a moment and SLAM back to reality. Lesson learned.

Being responsible

I have been working with a money coach these last couple of months. I signed up through the employee assistance program at my company. It has been an eye opener for me for sure. I have always had fabulous credit since my mom consigned my first loan for my first car to establish credit. Great credit comes with high available credit on credit cards as well as good interest rates. I have been able to keep things under control over the years or at least bail myself out rather quickly. Well this last year has been one of over spending and trying to keep up with my friends. Now in paying the bill for this. I was able to transfer to an interest free 18 months to pay off everything. This cost me a mere 2% transfer fee which is far better than the interest rate I was paying. Today I accompanied my BFF to a Harley store where she bought a new bike. As I waited I looked at all the t-shirts on the clearance rack and thought about all the HD shirts I already have. How many can one woman wear anyhow? I'm proud to say I didn't even buy a $2. poker chip! I think I'm learning!

Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

As I mentioned in a previous post, patience is not something I was blessed with. After my second divorce I tried to date but found that I just wasn't ready to make that emotional jump. I tried again a year or so later by signing onto a dating site but found the rejection or lack of curtesy too much to take. So again I took myself off the site. When Steve (ex2) passed away I had a very difficult time with emotions. After a little over a year after his passing I was finally feeling I could do this. I could start again. I signed back up on the site. This time was different. I felt better about the people I was talking with. There were/are some real nut jobs out there. But for the most part I have been able to steer clear of them. I met "T" and had a good 4 months with him but now hindsight tells me that I really didn't have a relationship with him but rather I was an option for him to stop by for dinner or have someone to do an occasional bike ride or movie. He never intended to have a relationship. It took some time but I now know that it wasn't so much him that I missed but the thought of a person to call mine. My mate, partner, my significant other. I want to be part of a team. I need/want a partner in crime. The other half of my dynamic duo. (No spandex required). I hear that good things come to those who wait... I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

Friend Good!

Friends: Sometimes we have friends that are more like family than our own families. We have friends that we can call and pick up right where they left off months or even years ago.  There are friends that come into our lives only to leave right away.  Sometimes they stay for a long time and for one reason or another they are suddenly gone leaving a wide open hole in our hearts.  This hole takes a long time to heal.  Sometimes it is never quite the same.  Then along comes a new friend who knows what you are going through from their own experiences.   Someone you instantly feel connected to.  They know your thoughts before you think them. They fit in your life like a comfortable old pair of jeans.  They are fun to be around, easy to talk with, to confide in and to relate to.  I bet several people reading this right now are thinking that I must be talking about them… truth is I am.  I cherish all my friends.  I know what limits I need to set with some and what privileges I can allow a few.  I have friends that drive me nuts but I still love them and wouldn’t trade them for the world.  I have been trying to keep myself out of awkward scenarios and avoid confrontation but I need to be true to myself too.  If I hurt anyone in the process I am truly sorry.  I had a friend of many years “ditch” me several years ago and it was one of the most painful things I ever went though.  It felt to me as if that person had died.  For a long time I didn’t have a real explanation for her sudden departure from my life.  Finally a mutual friend told me one of the real reasons was that she didn’t like some of my recent life choices.  They probably were not the best choices but they were mine and mine alone to make.  No one was hurt in the process.  Today as I look back on that friendship I try to remember the good times we had, the laughs, the tears, the joys and the sorrows.  I smile and can finally move on.  I am hoping this coming winter will be a season of new beginnings for me.  I have a feeling that I am about to embark on a new and exciting journey; a new chapter in the book of me.