Friday, December 7, 2012

Today I....

Today I noticed:

Today while driving to work I notice a FedEx driver laughing his head off in his truck while driving down the road.  I guess I am not the only one who talks to myself and cracks myself up.  Whether I am on my bike or in my car, I always look at the other drivers while I drive down the road.  Most of the time on the way to work they are half asleep or putting on makeup.  Though one day this week there was a lady reading the paper while driving.  That isn't too bright if you ask me.  If I am on the bike and see people texting or not paying attention I sometimes ride up next to them and tell them to cut that crap out.  Though there was one lady who just happened to be looking at her hands or something.  I apologized to her.

Today I felt:

Today I felt really REALLY tired.  I slept really well (or I thought I did anyway).  I got a solid 8 hours of sleep with only one little pee break for Buffy (and myself too).  I do have to say that my dreams have been very lucid and vivid these last few days.  I have been "working" all night long a lot from what I can remember.  I know that it is going to be a long day when I dream about sleeping.  You would think that would be like double dipping but nope, still tired.

Today I am grateful for:

Today I am grateful for a good job.  The companies that I work for are both good to their employees and compensate for jobs well done. Throughout my life I have been laid off several times and fired a few times though I am still scratching my head over those.  I have always been able to land on my feet.  There have been setback but each time I find a good position that may not pay as well but does appreciate me for my work ethic. I am glad I don't have to punch a time clock most days though.

Today I realized:

Today I realized that even though I don't have love, I am loved.  Maybe the person I need isn't quite ready for me yet and I just have to give it time. I have hope for the future.

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Blessed ... But...

As most people who know me at all are aware, I do not like holidays. It's getting harder and harder to remember the last time I enjoyed them. I think it goes back at least 9 or 10 years now. I used to love the gatherings of friends and family, the decorating and the lights. I used to love shopping for just the perfect gift for someone and wrapping it. Now not so much. I see the trees in people's homes and people shopping and it makes me sad. I used to love the music and would sing at the top of my lungs. Now if I hear them all I hear is sadness and quickly change the station. I want to find Christmas again. I keep looking and maybe someday I will find it.

http://youtu.be/TQqZU14kgOg